“You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from,” according to novelist Cormac McCarthy. While the Dalai Lama says that “sometimes not getting what we want is a wonderful stroke of luck.”
I’m not sure I agree with either of them.
I can’t say I wanted anything except to get home for dinner
after a day of college classes when a tractor trailer popped into the driver’s
side door of my VW Beetle, picked me up, and carried me down the interstate
highway. It was one of those moments when time slowed to a crawl. Hmm…there’s
a truck in my window. I climbed over
the gear shift and into the passenger seat, inexplicably still holding the steering
wheel as though I thought it would help the situation. Eventually my car
bounced off the truck’s grill, spun across a few lanes, and landed in the
median facing the opposite direction.
Sometimes I wonder how I made it to the age where I was old
enough to drive a car.
As a curious child, I inserted a metal wire into an
electrical outlet just to see what would happen. What happened? A jolt that
felt like the pins and needles you get when a limb goes to sleep magnified a
few thousand times as I was catapulted across the room. But no permanent damage
that I’m aware of. I guess I was lucky.
Undeterred, I was playing by an empty warehouse that had a
slanted driveway leading to the underground garage door. The driveway was
filled with water, and I’m still not sure what happened except that when I touched
a pipe, I felt that now-familiar jolt of electrical energy. Lucky again.
I could go on, but the pertinent fact is that I survived all
of it, which I probably shouldn’t say because it might be unlucky.
Maybe Mr. McCarthy and the Dalai Lama have a point after
all.
I don't know if you ever watched Hee Haw, a country TV comedy show, but they have a song with the chorus of "If it weren't for bad luck, I would have no luck at all". I guess that is your song.
ReplyDeleteRabies causes foaming of the mouth. I guess, since you are still here, that you got the rabies vaccinations so you would not get rabies.
I was probably five or so, so the details are vague. I just remember this nice little doggie and taking it inside and up the back stairs and my mother taking one look and getting VERY excited and then the policeman shooting him. Fortunately, he didn't bite me. The dog, not the cop.
DeleteYou are always so funny, and now we get to add fearless to the definition. Although I hope you're staying away from wires and all things electrical these days...
ReplyDeleteFearless or foolish?
DeleteMy younger brother tried a bobby pin in the electrical outlet and went scooting across the room. I did other dangerous things. I pinned a red towel to my shoulders and jumped out of a tree, convinced I could fly like Superman if I had a red cape. I couldn't, plus I got in trouble for making a hole in a new towel that tore when I crash-landed. It's probably a miracle that any of us survived childhood.
ReplyDeleteMy son put on his Superman pjs and tried to fly off the back of the couch. To this day he has a hole in his tongue. Did you know they can't stitch tongues?
DeleteYou've had a lot of adventures. I think you should write those up for kids to read although parents most likely wouldn't agree. Your own parents must have wanted you to have a body guard. Glad you made it to adulthood. Yes, you are lucky.
ReplyDeleteThose were the milder, PG rated ones. I did write up some others that my agent has been shopping around for a few years now. Self-pubbing in the future.
DeleteYou must be channeling a cat, Hannah. Keep track of the lives you have left. : D
ReplyDeleteLOL!!!
DeleteWhen I was a kid, I got my adventures through reading. You were a wild child.
ReplyDeleteOf course, reading. Just one more chapter and I'll go to sleep. Put a towel under the door so they couldn't see I had the light on. And always missing the bus in the morning because I stayed up so late. Still doing it, minus having to hide it.
DeleteWow, I'm glad I wasn't your mom. I would have died of a heart attack in no time. But those are all great tales of adventure that you can laugh about now and pass on to your family. And maybe put into a book somewhere.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure my little adventures built character for her. Right???
DeleteShoot! You sure are lucky! And going to Disney was the perfect thing to do with the money!
ReplyDeleteYes, I used to laugh when I saw those commercials where they were going to Disney. I did it when Disney had just opened. Epcot didn't even exist then. Ahead of my time!
DeleteYou live a charmed life. This means you are here to do great things... see you on the New York Times Bestsellers List soon! From my mouth or rather yours(lucky you) to God's Ear!
ReplyDeleteOh, Hannah. Your guardian angel must have worked overtime on your behalf. All of the trouble I got in as a child was because of my older brother. He'd say, "Let's get in the car and drive." He was 5 I think; I was 3. "Okay," I'd say. He managed to shift it into neutral. Since it was parked on a hill, down the hill we flew. Whee! Across the road and into a ditch on the other side. That was the earliest trouble I can remember, and, wow! Did we get in trouble! Wherever he led, I followed, usually into misadventure that got us both punished.
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