What Does Mom Say? By @karilemor #RomanceGems

Originally I’d planned to write a beautiful post about my newest grandchild. My first granddaughter. My oldest daughter has two boys, highly active boys, and this third baby is a precious, little girl.

Unfortunately, the darling flower has decided to be shy and stick around in Mama’s belly for ten days longer than she was supposed to. Thus, I needed to go to Plan B for this post. Unfortunately, again, I didn’t have a Plan B.

I decided to let other mothers everywhere write the post for me. So here are some humorous quotes from moms. Because when you have children, you have to make sure to laugh!

 

"No one told me I would be coming home in diapers, too." – Chrissy Teigen

 "Motherhood. It takes patience, humor and a lot of wet towelettes."  — Unknown

 “If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?” — Milton Berle

 "Silence is golden. Unless you have kids. Then silence is just suspicious."  — Unknown

 "I always say if you aren't yelling at your kids, you're not spending enough time with them." – Reese Witherspoon

  "I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them." – Phyllis Diller

  “The majority of my diet is made up of foods that my kids didn't finish." — Carrie Underwood

  "I’ve learned to use meditation and relaxation to handle stress. Just kidding, I’m on my third glass of wine."  — Unknown

 “Why don't kids understand that their nap is not for them but for us?” — Alyson Hannigan

 "Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath, and hope we've set aside enough money to pay for our kids' therapy.” — Michelle Pfeiffer

  "A mother is the person you can always call to see how long chicken lasts in the fridge."  — Unknown

 "If at first you don’t succeed, try doing it the way your mom told you to do it from the start." — Unknown

 “The 2 y/o grabbed my cheeks, looked into my eyes, smiled sweetly, leaned in close, and …coughed in my face. And that sums up parenthood.” –Jenn H Scott

 “Toddler: A small creature who is only hungry after you throw away the food she refused to eat the first eighty times you offered it to her.” -Hollow Tree Ventures

 “There should be an energy drink name 6 AM toddler.” – Simon Holland

 “I don’t want to sleep like a baby, I want to sleep like my husband.” — Unknown

 “A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.” — Jerry Seinfeld

 “That moment when you go to check on your sleeping baby and their eyes ping open so you drop to the floor and roll out of the room like a ninja.” — Unknown

 

I love writing children and have been told I do them well. I suppose after three of my own plus thirty years of teaching young elementary school, I should know what they are like.

Here are my books that feature children:

Running Target

A deadly game of cat and mouse…

A price on his head.

A family to protect.

Getting the goods on a mob boss won’t be easy,

especially while he’s a running target.

 https://www.karilemor.com/running-target

 

Elusive Dreams

Creating a family might be the only way to heal two scarred souls...

An injured Marine,

 an introverted loner,

two orphaned children needing a home.

Can they create a perfectly imperfect family?

                                                                                              https://www.karilemor.com/elusive-dreams

 

Broken Dreams

True family is more than an image…

A new single dad.

An unconventional nanny.

A little boy in his own world.

Can she show them that family is more than an image?

                                                                                          https://www.karilemor.com/broken-dreams

 Here's where you can check out all my books!!

Kari Lemor

Other places to stalk me!!

Website: https://www.karilemor.com/ 

 Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/Karilemorauthor/

 Twitter:  https://twitter.com/karilemor

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 Goodreads:  https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/9756283.Kari_Lemor

 BookBub:  https://www.bookbub.com/authors/kari-lemor