Oh, the pressure! Valentine’s Day is here again. You’d think a romance writer would be brimming with ideas for what to get her spouse on this occasion.
You’d think wrong.
First of all, the cards…
I spent an hour or so perusing the card selection in my favorite Hallmark store. Yes, I’m a romance writer, but not a mushy-gushy type of person. So that eliminated about half the cards that were so sweet I’m sure my husband would not only gag when reading them, but would wonder if aliens had replaced his wife with a doppelganger. Many of the cards involve alcohol consumption, and while my husband generally has a beer when we go out on Saturday night, drinking isn’t so much a part of his routine that buying a card with drinking jokes would make any sense. Apparently, many men are obsessed with playing golf, judging from the number of cards that refer to it. My husband finds it boring. And then there are the ones that focus on fixing things around the house or doing chores, neither of which are my husband’s forte.
Eventually I’ll stumble upon some moderately suggestive, faintly funny, somewhat sarcastic card that fits the bill, more or less.
And then it’s on to the gift…
Many women tell me they don’t bother exchanging gifts with their partners, but where’s the fun in that? I know I’ll get a gift and I’d feel guilty if I didn’t give one in return.
So over the years I’ve bought an assortment of gifts that might be considered a bit peculiar and not terribly romantic.
Like a session of shooting zombies at an indoor gun range. (He used this one because we went together.) And a gift certificate to the new hatchet-throwing facility that just opened near us. (He continues to tell me he’s going to go with a buddy. Soon. Very soon.) A one-hour massage session I’m considering confiscating if the facility will still honor a five-year-old gift card. A drone that has never come out of the box.
I could go on, but there are only a few days left until Valentine’s Day and I should probably be spending the time trying to come up with the next off-the-wall addition to a long line of gifts.
I’d love to hear other people’s Valentine traditions. What’s the best or the strangest gift you’ve ever given? Or that you’ve received?