Things I Do To Aggravate The Husband |
Hello, my new friends. I'd like to share some musings and some photos with you as you get to know me. Today's thoughts are both silly and sappy, so bear with me. As a writer of romance, I often think about the nature of love. It’s sort of a job requirement, I suppose. This morning, with coffee in hand, laptop (and dogs) on lap, and husband snoring in the bedroom, I began thinking about how love changes over time . I found myself chuckling in between the snores and sentence pauses because ten years ago - when our love story began - I couldn’t imagine that specimen of a man doing something so unattractive as snoring.
That, of course, was the new love phase, when everything they say and do is magical and perfect. Little flowers and hearts float around your heads all day. Every text or phone call is greeted with giddy excitement. Adventures abound and nothing can bring you down from the clouds. You can scarcely imagine it getting any better than the all-consuming lusty love of it all.
Our Wedding Day |
And then it does. Slowly, almost unnoticeable at first. Ease and comfort replace the awkward getting-to-know-you and nervousness. He doesn't have to tell you he hates broccoli or likes his pizza crust burnt, you already know. You stop wondering if every little fight means the end. You relax, open up , trust, and let yourself fall.
Love stops always looking like flowers and fancy dinners, but more often like Chinese takeout, an old movie, and your ratty pajamas. It stops sounding like, "I'm so in love with you," and more like, "I unloaded the dishwasher for you, babe." Love, in its maturity, feels less like a roller coaster, and more like a canoe on a gently rippling lake. To be sure, I love all stages of romantic love. But I love this kind of love most of all.
My sweet, still snoring husband asked me once - early in our relationship - if I was in love with love. I laughed and said, "Absolutely. Who wouldn't be?"
He persisted, "Yes, but how can you be sure you love me, and not just the idea of being in love?"
It was a fair question, one I didn't have a ready answer for. In my forty-seven years, I've had plenty of experience in falling in love. In fact, I was fabulous at it. And yes, more times than not, I'd fallen in love with an idea of a man, rather than the men themselves. As to be expected , those relationships crashed and burned once the blinders came off.
Kind of Sums Us Up |
Then came this man. Is it too cliche to say this time was different? Because it was. Different. Unexpected. Challenging. Real. For the first time, I didn't plot our entire future after a first date. I forced myself to live in the moment . I locked my rose-tinted glasses in a virtual drawer. I traded the word 'forever' for 'so far.' I let the relationship grow at its own pace. I learned how to love more than just an idea. I figured out that love is no puzzle at all. It is Timing, Chemistry, Patience, and Tolerance. It's romantic dinners and snoring. It's vacations and holding hands when faced with the worst news of your life. It's seeing his car in the driveway when you get home and smiling that he's there... and swearing because he didn't bring up the garbage can. Love is a life built on moments.
So sappy, right? I'm not always like this, I promise. But it is Valentine's Month (
I'd love for you to check it out HERE
This book is so dear to my heart because it is, at its core, a love letter to my husband. I wanted the world to know - in my quirky way - how grateful I am to be loved by a man such as the one I married. Though the story is pure fiction, its heart is in truth .
As we continue to get acquainted, I'll share more of my stories (and the stories behind them!) But for now I'd like to thank you for letting me into your world. I truly love getting to know my readers, so come on by and say hey on social media @authorelsakurt any time.
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Loved getting to know you better!
ReplyDeleteThanks Peggy! xo
DeleteThank you, Elsa, you captured the first moments of love so well. Enjoyed your post. Will see you online!
ReplyDeleteThanks Nora! See you in cyberspace! xo
DeleteAh, I love sweetness. We need more of it these days. I enjoyed your post and am glad you are here. Great pics of you and the Snoring Man.
ReplyDeleteHaha! Forever more, the Snoring Man! I'm so happy to be here in such amazing company. xo
DeleteLove the post! Love the pics!
ReplyDeleteThank you!! xo
DeleteGreat post and beautiful words, Elsa! Over 32 years of marriage to Mr. H, and I totally get you. No kidding, we'll be eating Chinese take-out and watching scary movies on Valentine's Day. Cheers to true love and sweetness!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Kathryn! Wouldn't trade those takeout & movie nights for anything! xo
DeleteThis is beautiful! So happy you found this love! I do remember those days in the first few years where any little tiff filled me with fear this was it! Now we know we're in it for the long haul. My husband and I always tell people, "We've been married almost 32 years...at least 17 of them happily." Of course his 17 and my 17 aren't necessarily the same. And there was lots of work that needed to be done to keep us together, from giving up. And we still work hard at it. Like your car or your house, you have to work on it to keep it in good shape or things fall apart.
ReplyDeleteSo excited to be working on this blog with you!!
You're so right, Kari! I feel like our marriage is the best 'job' I've ever had. I'm so enjoying living vicariously through your traveling adventures! Thank you for the kind words xo
DeleteLoved your blog!
ReplyDeletecrossnstitch2 at aol dot com
Thanks Karen! Always scary hitting the 'publish' button, so much appreciated xo
DeleteGreat post. So easy to relate to. Can't wait to read your books.
ReplyDeleteThank you!! xo
DeleteYour awesome Melanie... such a trip... evenly funny and amazing... Love the blog!!!������������
ReplyDeleteLove ya, Mar! xoxo
DeleteI LOVE this post! You're so right that love changes over time and grows deeper. Boy, can I relate to the "and" situations. Thank you for sharing such a warm part of yourself, Elsa.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Satin! xoxo
DeleteTakeout Chinese and a movie was our first date. A forever loving evening.
ReplyDeleteSome of the best memories are of the simplest times! Xoxo
DeleteGreat post. And so very true.
ReplyDeletedebby236 at gmail dot com
Thanks, Debby xoxo
Delete"My sweet, still snoring husband..."
ReplyDeleteI laughed so hard reading this post! Such a cute couple S2
I hope I can find true love too!
"Still Here" has such a sweet plot - will add to my TBR list.
Wish you lots of new readers and sales!
My contact info: adissidente at gmail dot com
Thank you Iris! xoxo
DeleteI loved everything about this post, Elsa. You eloquently captured the different phases of love—make that true love. I'm so glad you joined Romance Gems, and I eagerly look forward to future posts.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great post about love. Thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeleteThis post is very simple to read and appreciate without leaving any details out. Great work! Kentucky personals
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